I'm on an antibiotic. I'm not going to say why because I believe that boundaries are our friends, and I know where this kind of conversation can lead and I don't want to hear about your medical problems. It's not that I don't care, it's just that ... who am I trying to fool? I don't care. The only reason I bring up my problem is to rant. Earlier in the week, my doctor prescribed a course of treatment: 3 pills for 3 days. Simple enough. So, I took the prescription to the pharmacy and learned that my insurance company would only pay for 2 pills at a time. Sure, that makes sense. I mean, paper-pushing penny-pinchers clearly have a MUCH better idea about what I need than MY DOCTOR. I took my 2 pills and came home.
Yesterday, I called in my "refill." I've just returned from the pharmacy. Seems the insurance company won't pay for me to take 3 pills in one week, no matter what MY DOCTOR (you know, the guy with the medical degree) thinks is an appropriate course of treatment. I tried to explain to the pharmacist that we've already tried it the insurance company's way and it didn't work. She was sympathetic but in the end, I lost the battle. In my frustration, I said, "You know, if this was Viagra, the insurance company would give me as much as I wanted anytime I wanted it." She nodded sympathetically, leaned toward me and muttered, "Yeah, we all know who makes these laws." Horny frustrated old men, that's who.
I took my outrage to Starbucks to refill my coffee supply. Good thing the insurance company isn't standing between me and my caffiene. Heads would roll and cities would burn, I tell you! As I waited for my beverage, I glanced around. Everywhere I looked, students had their noses buried in textbooks - on a holiday weekend. Warmed this cynical professor's heart. None of them were studying history and none of them were my students, but at least I'm not ready to throttle anyone anymore.
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Now I remember why I wanted to do this
Today, it's cold outside. OK, it's not below zero or anything, but it is below 40 and that's cold in my book. Didn't stop a few jackasses from donning their shorts and flip-flops and wandering around campus. I wonder if their mommies will write them a note when they're sick with pnuemonia next week. (Crap - when did I turn 80?!)
I headed across town to the university to do something that I haven't done in a year - research on my own work. Lately, as the pressures of teaching have taken over my life, I've been feeling disconnected from my work. I do remember being excited about my research at some point in the not-so-distant past. I have vague memories of enjoying the process of piecing the puzzle together to create a narrative. I seem to recall an almost "high" feeling on particularly good days. Yes, I also remember the utter and complete agony of writer's block and the devestating realization that I will, once again, have to restart this chapter. But, I'm choosing to be Pollyanna and focus on the positive.
So, today, I packed up the laptop and headed to the library. It was great! A perfect afternoon. The books I wanted were in a special reading room, far from the undergrad crowd. And, there really wasn't an undergrad crowd because it's a holiday weekend. A couple of students trickled in and out, but mostly, I had the place to myself. I set up and got to work. Almost immediately, I remembered why I wanted to pursue this largely thankless career.
I'm not really sure what I'm looking for at this point. I have a vague outline of a narrative that didn't really fit into my dissertation. It has all the earmarks of a compelling story: interesting historical actors, deep-rooted tension, rich local context. I'm sure there's a story there. So, I'm digging without a clear direction or purpose. Just digging. It's great! I feel like an academic glutton. I'm not on a research trip where I have to try to make the most of my travel money. This resource is right across town. Ready and waiting for me anytime I can get over there. Now, if I could just get rid of all of my pesky students at Big City University...
I spent the afternoon with a few books about focus of my initial investigation. All colorful histories by equally colorful writers. I also found a pictorial history of the county and had much fun looking at pictures of people I didn't know and would probably never meet. There's something about the rural south, particularly Georgia, that connects with me. Mind you, I don't want to live in rural Georgia, but the people, places, and history fascinate me.
While I was researching my target county, I allowed myself to get sidetracked and took a look at a book about the county where my mother's family lives. I think I squeaked when I found a reference to my great-great-grandfather. I also found references to freedpeople living in the county before the Civil War. "What's that story?" I wondered. Made a note to check it out later.
Tomorrow, I may head back to look at local newspapers. Microfilm isn't my friend, but in this case, I may make an exception. I am, without a doubt and without apology, a geek.
I headed across town to the university to do something that I haven't done in a year - research on my own work. Lately, as the pressures of teaching have taken over my life, I've been feeling disconnected from my work. I do remember being excited about my research at some point in the not-so-distant past. I have vague memories of enjoying the process of piecing the puzzle together to create a narrative. I seem to recall an almost "high" feeling on particularly good days. Yes, I also remember the utter and complete agony of writer's block and the devestating realization that I will, once again, have to restart this chapter. But, I'm choosing to be Pollyanna and focus on the positive.
So, today, I packed up the laptop and headed to the library. It was great! A perfect afternoon. The books I wanted were in a special reading room, far from the undergrad crowd. And, there really wasn't an undergrad crowd because it's a holiday weekend. A couple of students trickled in and out, but mostly, I had the place to myself. I set up and got to work. Almost immediately, I remembered why I wanted to pursue this largely thankless career.
I'm not really sure what I'm looking for at this point. I have a vague outline of a narrative that didn't really fit into my dissertation. It has all the earmarks of a compelling story: interesting historical actors, deep-rooted tension, rich local context. I'm sure there's a story there. So, I'm digging without a clear direction or purpose. Just digging. It's great! I feel like an academic glutton. I'm not on a research trip where I have to try to make the most of my travel money. This resource is right across town. Ready and waiting for me anytime I can get over there. Now, if I could just get rid of all of my pesky students at Big City University...
I spent the afternoon with a few books about focus of my initial investigation. All colorful histories by equally colorful writers. I also found a pictorial history of the county and had much fun looking at pictures of people I didn't know and would probably never meet. There's something about the rural south, particularly Georgia, that connects with me. Mind you, I don't want to live in rural Georgia, but the people, places, and history fascinate me.
While I was researching my target county, I allowed myself to get sidetracked and took a look at a book about the county where my mother's family lives. I think I squeaked when I found a reference to my great-great-grandfather. I also found references to freedpeople living in the county before the Civil War. "What's that story?" I wondered. Made a note to check it out later.
Tomorrow, I may head back to look at local newspapers. Microfilm isn't my friend, but in this case, I may make an exception. I am, without a doubt and without apology, a geek.
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